Posts Tagged ‘Hope’

I finally had a goo, d day, I’m starting to feel better! I hope I don’t report differently tomorrow. The last few weeks have been such a roller coaster. I actually had enough energy to clean the house, do the laundry, and make dinner… all in the same day! That hasn’t happened in sooo long. Praise Jesus, I think the meds are working!!! It’s hard to get through the bad times but when you get to the good times you have a renewed sense of hope, a hope of living. I might be crazy but when you get down to it I”m just a girl trying to find herself in this crazy life we find ourselves in when we’re in our twenties. – XOXO CrazyInHeels

So I’m back to sad and crying today. I’m not going to spend time bitching about it because I know it will get better. My doctor said this would happen after a week or so of being on the new meds. I have an appointment with her tomorrow so I’m sure we will adjust accordingly. I’m counting down the minutes. It’s funny how we rely on a doctor and meds for our happiness. We schedule doctors appointments and shove pills down our throat all in hopes of being “normal” as normal as I can get :p I’m still a CrazyInHeels gal no matter how you look at. I view the world a little bit different, I have my own way of living and that’s how it’ll be and I’m happy with that. Still hanging on during this wild ride we call life… while being “crazy”. – XOXO CrazyInHeels

I am so very excited to report that I’m feeling like myself again. I have climbed my way out of the deep black hole of depression that was closing in around me. I actually turned the radio up in the car and bounced around with the windows down this morning. That’s how I know I’m in a good mood, I listen to music on the way to work. I didn’t feel like I was stuck in the same routine of absolute hopelessness that I have been so graciously blessed with the last month or so. I thought for sure I was going to wake up in a bad mood for the rest of my life, not even a brand new pair of heels would cheer my up :p I’m back to living, loving, feeling, and laughing. I am my CrazyInHeels self. – XOXO CrayInHeels

It was a little hard to get out of bed this morning but I did it anyways. As the morning progress’ I’m happy to report that my mood is significantly better than yesterday. I have more energy than the last couple of weeks. I think it makes me feel better just to go see my doctor and then know that I’m starting a new med that will make me feel better. Almost a relief that the happiness will return soon. I’m returning to a “normal” state of mind (whatever that is) without the manic depression or, unfortunately, the hypo-mania. I’m easier to talk to but not overly talkative. I’m not confined to my bed because of depression. I’m not combative and angry. I’m not overreacting and irrational. I’m coming back to me.  -CrazyInHeels

My fiance noticed a difference already this morning. I’m sure he’s jumping for joy on the inside.