» Agitated

The Journey To Normal

Nicole — Wed, 21 Apr 2010 02:01:24 +0000

Where am I today… somewhere in between normal and crazy. I guess maybe this is where I’m supposed to be since I’m “crazy”. The last week has been rough. I’m happy and normal all day and then something switches to the on position and I’m angry, sad and agitated… WTF?! We’re adjusting my meds accordingly, hoping to get to the exact dosage my body needs, tricky task I must say. In the mean time I feel happy at times but with the lingering possibility that I can go from zero to crazy in point two seconds. I guess sometimes you just have to grab on and hold on to the possibility that “normal” will return, at least I hope. The feelings of “losing my mind” will slowly slip into yesterdays memory. For now, I’ll hope for a best and enjoy my time off as I travel along the journey… back to normal! – XOXO CrazyInHeels

Where Am I??

Nicole — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 04:54:02 +0000

I’m lost as to what mood I’m in at this precise moment. Today has been a whirlwind. I was tired this morning, then agitated & moody, then talkative & excited then all the way back to agitated and moody. Can someone point me in the direction of “normal” (if there is such a thing?)! Sometimes I get so sick of all these “crazy” feelings that I want to wine, complain, scream, cry, pout, and burry myself under my covers! If you want the truth… some days are just down right shitty!!! Ok, Ok… I’m done complaining for now. I’m giving myself time to wallow and then I’m back to seeing the positive in life, even though it’s next to impossible sometimes. Closing my eyes hoping tomorrow brings much happiness. -XOXO CrazyInHeels

Cranky… Yet Again

Nicole — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 21:11:23 +0000

I’m going to try and stay positive even though my brain decided to slap me in the face this morning with a bad mood! I woke up yet again to another cranky and depressed mood. I have to try and make mysefl laugh about this depressed state of mind or I won’t make it through the day. I’ve been cursed with crazy thoughts and I can’t escape them. I just love to be so angry, cranky, sad, depressed, negative, crying, agitated, and frusrtrated… yea right! I want to kick up my heels for the day and crawl into bed, but I can’t and I won’t! I have to keep it together as best I can for now. I know deep down that these feelings will pass and I’m just having “crazy” thoughts temporarily, easy said then done right?! I know, trust me, but what else am I gonna do? I wish I could give an honest answer when people ask me how my day is… oh the things I would say! Blah, blah, blah I’m lucky I have enough energy to write. Hopefully I make it till five without losing my mind in front of those around me (how embarassing would that be, or funny :p)

- XOXO CrazyInHeels